Younger, Yet Older
by EchoResonance
Summary: He was the youngest one in the Black Order. The youngest of his friends. For the most part, he seemed like a normal, happy-go-lucky fifteen year old boy. But there was a darker side to him, shadows and scars from his past that might never fully heal


He was only fifteen. Most of the time, he was nothing more than a carefree, happy-go-lucky boy. He was younger than all of his friends, and the least experienced in the world of the Black Order. For the most part. But that loud, seemingly happy child, with no troubles that anyone was allowed to see…He was so much more.

Allen Walker had seen things. Horrible things. He had done things. Horrible things. He never knew his parents, though this was a common story, especially among exorcists. The first father figure he had ever had had been a travelling performer called Mana. The man took Allen in, raising the boy as his own son. He had loved that child, and the child had loved him. Him, the first man, the first human being, to ever accept him as he was, left arm and all.

And then he died. It was sudden. One night, in a carriage crash. Allen survived. Mana did not. Distraught, the young boy had called out for the man who was as good as his father. He couldn't die. He couldn't. Mana had taught him how to take care of himself, but in the face of having to do just that, Allen couldn't remember how. He needed Mana. Needed his father.

That was when the Earl of Millennium appeared, offering Allen the opportunity to bring back his lost father. It was too fantastic an idea, too impossible, but reason had left the child. He needed his father. All he had to do was call Mana's name. And so he did, and his father came back. But he came back as an Akuma. He cursed his adopted son with an eye that could see the tortured souls of Akuma, and then Allen's strange left arm reacted to the presence of his father. It became the weapon that had lain dormant inside him, and killed the Akuma that Mana had become. The man's last breath was spent to tell Allen how much he loved him.

Then General Cross found him, sitting at Mana's grave, staring at his transformed arm in amazement. His hair had gone from rich brown to pure, snowy white, most likely due to the curse. Cross offered the kid a place as his apprentice. Offered to train him as an Exorcist. After all, his left arm was an Anti-Akuma weapon. The kid accepted this offer, deciding to become an Exorcist in order to save the souls of Akuma everywhere, destroying the weapons and freeing the spirits forced to do the Earl's bidding.

The years he spent with Cross weren't exactly pretty, easy, or painless. The kid had already seen too much for his age, and he grew up way too fast. That eye of his was handy for hunting down Akuma, but he had to do a variety of other things.

He had to gamble. Had to cheat. Had to steal. It was the only way to pay off General Cross's enormous debts. The ones that the man refused to pay himself, which was to say, all. He had to take care of a carnivorous plant that wanted to eat him, under threat of his head being withered by Cross.

I shook my head. The kid was three years younger than me, and his soul, his mind…they were darker than mine had ever been. I was a fairly jaded person, though I'd like to have thought that I was still a happy guy. When I first met Allen, I thought he was just a kid. He was young, he was fresh, still green around the gills. Yeah, he was powerful, and yeah, he was pretty smart, but he was only fifteen. It wasn't until after we snagged Krory and had to save him from a game of strip poker—which was admittedly hilarious—that I caught my first real glimpse of Allen's dark side.

When I first met him, and I learned about what his eye could do, I thought it'd be damn handy to have an eye like that. But at Krory's castle…when we fought Eliade…Damn, seeing her soul was scary. I would hate to have to see those things, every day, all my life. The world that Allen sees…The way that he sees it…It's Hell. Allen's life is Hell. It's always been. And I would hate to have the curse he has.

If I were Allen, I probably would have given up a long time ago. I don't think I could manage such madness. Such horror. I would have driven myself insane with all the Akuma souls that I saw. I'd experienced death in my life, but not like he had. Yeah, I'd had some hard times, but I was pretty confident that his far overshadowed mine.

"Lavi! Are you coming?"

I looked around. Allen was hanging over the rail of the train, waving for me to get a move on. A huge smile split his face, and despite his past, I knew it was authentic. He could still be calm. Still be happy. He lived in the present, and in the present, everything was fine. Lenalee, Allen and I were heading back to Komui with the newly retrieved Innocence. Kanda was off who-knows-where doing who-knows-what, probably being a prick in the process. Cook was back at HQ preparing all the food he possibly could.

In this moment, life was great, and Allen could smile and mean it. His past didn't haunt him, though by all means it should. He knew how to accept what had happened, understanding that there really wasn't anything he could do to change it. That was why he was an Exorcist. To atone for any of his sins, and to save the souls forsaken by the Earl.

"Hurry up!" he shouted.

I smirked and sprinted to him as the train began to move. Taking a flying leap, I managed to land on the railing of the landing, teetering precariously. The white-haired boy caught me by the front of my coat and hauled me gracelessly onto the platform.

"Thanks," I laughed, standing and brushing myself off.

"No problem," Allen chuckled. "C'mon in, Lenalee wants to talk to both of us."

"Yeah."

I followed the white-haired boy, capable of such power, of standing tall despite the ever-growing burden that threatened to break him, inside the train.


End file.
